TIDS and BITS
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Q -
When
should the engagement be announced? ..........and by whom? A
- The announcement should be made public by the
brides' parents as soon after the fact as possible.
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Q -When
a couple becomes engaged which family contacts which? A
- Either. It used to be the responsibility of
the groom's parents to make contact, but today the customs ae changing.
Couples often do their own announcing and often are the ones that bring
the parents to meet.
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Q -
What
about an engagement party?
A - As
soon as the engagement is announced, or in order to announce an engagement,
a party is given. It may, today, be given by either set of parents, by
the friends, or even by the couple themselves.
-
Q -
Who
gives a bridal shower?
A - Showers
can be given by anyone, but are usually from best friends, sisters, or
new sisters-in-law.
-
Q -
Is
there a limit on the number of showers a bride can have? A
- No. But, too much of a good thing.............
-
Q -
What
should one buy for a shower gift? A - Most
showers today are about specific themes. (eg. Linen Showers, Bath or Kitchen
showers).
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Q -
What
is a stag and doe party?
A - Basically,
it's a combination of, or perhaps an elimination of, the shower and the
stag. It's a mixed party of gift giving, dancing and merriment.
-
Q -
Who
puts on the stag? A - The
bestman.
-
Q -
Is
it offensive not to attend a stag? A - No.
It's offensive not to buy a ticket. Today stags are generally a fund raiser
with funds given to the groom at the end of the night.
-
Q -
This
is my second marriage. Should I accept an offer for someone to have a shower
for me? A -
Certainly.No
question about it.
-
Q -
What's
a rehearsal dinner?
A - A
rehearsal dinner is anything from a private evening with the bestman and
maid of honour, to an elaborate gathering of the wedding party, parents,
and close friends. It's held after the ceremony rehearsal, hence the name.
A rehearsal dinner usually ends by 11 pm to give the couple a chance for
a good night's sleep.
-
Q -
Who
sits where in the church?
A - The
bride's family sits on the left side, while the groom's family takes the
right. Friends sit on either side. It's the responsibility of the ushers
to do the balancing.
-
Q -
Is
it okay for the bride to wear white at her second marriage? A
- Today's second marriages say, "Go for it!"
-
Q -
What
about the use of cameras in the church? A - Ask
the officiator if it's allowed.
-
Q -
Are
there rules about using confetti? A - Usually,
the groom has paid a fee for clean-up, so go ahead and throw it!
-
Q -
Who
drives the cars in the wedding? A - Limousines
are usually chauffeur driven. In their absence, the father of the bride,
or someone from the bride's family drives to the ceremony; and the bestman,
or one of the ushers does the honors thereafter.
-
Q -
Should
an "EX" come to the church ceremony? A - Not
in a million years. Even longer for the reception.
-
Q -
When
is the return of the formals expected? A - Formals
are usually returned the next day (except Sunday). Those not returned as
pre-arranged may be subject to an extra charge.
-
Q -
Where
do the remarried parents of the bride or groom sit? A
- Not all together. In the case of divorced and
remarried parents never seat the former couple together. It just makes
everyone completely uncomfortable. Instead seat them separately and be
glad they both came.
-
Q -
What
does the bride do with her bouquet at the reception? A
- Most bridesmaid's bouquets will lay on the table,
as with the bride's, unless the shape is a cascade or crescent type. A
special holder is available from the florist if needed.
-
Q -
Is
it polite to ask to see the bride's rings?
A -
Yes.
Even encouraged.
-
Q -
Why
are toasts given? A - Apart
from tradition, toasts are a way of loosening the tension and introducing
the rest of the guests to the important relatives.
-
Q -
What
time does the reception usually end? A - The
reception officially ends after the bride and groom leave. However, bars
have been known to stay open, and disc jockeys have been known to keep
working, into the wee hours.
-
Q -
Is
the bestman the master of ceremonies? A - Not
necessarily --- although he could be. Today, the M.C. is chosen for his
wit and lack of shyness. In some cases, the M.C. is hired.
-
Q -
How
long before the wedding should you have your wine made? A
- A minimum of 3 months.
-
Q -How
long do you have to send out your wedding thank you notes? Q
- 3 months from when you get home from your
honeymoon!
-
WHEN
TO BOOK YOUR D.J.? You should book your D.J. at the same time as
you book your Hall.
-
When
should you book your photographer? The same time as the church
, hall and D.J. Get these items co-ordinated, then take care of the rest.
-
Surprise
your Bride on the wedding morning by sending her a beautiful bouquet of
flowers to say I Love You Forever! Contact your floral wedding consultant
so you don't miss this opportunity!
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CUSTOMS
AND HOW THEY CAME TO BE: The Wedding Ring. The circular shape of
the wedding is used to symbolize never ending love. The ring, as is the
case with many customs, was supposed to protect the bride against evil
spirits. If this ring was dropped during the ceremony, it was said that
bad luck would follow. In ancient Egypt before coins were used, gold rings
were actually used as currency and would symbolize the groom's wealth and
intentions to wed the bride-to-be. In order to show his wife that he trusted
her with his money, the Egyptian husband placed a gold ring on the third
finger of her left hand. Only one ring was worn until the thirteenth century
when Pope Innocent III declared a waiting period was to be observed between
betrothal and marriage. This then led to separate betrothal and wedding
rings.
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CUSTOMS
AND HOW THEY CAME TO BE: The Bridal Veil. Originally, the bride's
veil was a symbol of her youth and virginity. The veils helped the brides
remain modest. In early times, veils were worn to protect the bride from
evil. In modern Muslim countries, a bride may wear her veil throughout
the entire courtship, not permitting the groom to see her face until after
the wedding. Many colour veils have been worn throughout the centuries
including red, blue and yellow. Early Christian brides wore white (purity
and celebration) or blue veils (Virgin Mary's purity). It is said that
Martha Washington's granddaughter, Nellie Custis, is said to have started
the custom of wearing a white lace veil. This was a result of a compliment
paid to her by her fiancé. Major Lawrence Lewis who was President
Washington's aide, when she was seen standing behind a lace window curtain.
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BRIDAL
WHITE: Bridal gowns have appeared in almost every colour through
time, including Norway's green and Iceland's black. During the Renaissance
period, wealthy ladies were adorned in luxurious velvets and golden cloth
gowns. White satin ball gowns were worn by practical 18th century brides
for their re-use value at future dances. White has been symbolic to celebration
dating back to the early Romans. Bridal white came along with the need
of Elizabethan brides to prove their virtue in the medieval colour of virginity.
By the 19th century, Wedding White was firmly the Victorian tradition in
confirming the essence of purity and was also a sign of affluence.
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